A Very Stylish Girl

01/14/2011

283.6 lbs

That's for real this time.

I did two amazing things this morning:  I weighed myself and I got to work on time!  Well, by 5 after 8.  That's pretty much on time.  Especially for me.

So it's obvious that I'm not really doing anything to lose weight right now.  I'm moderately thinking about what I eat, but that's about it.  Mostly that includes not ordering anything with sugar.  I don't care so much about the fat.  Or carbs.  Actually,....that might not be so true.  I have consumed a fair amount of Jack and Coke.  So.  I'm minimally thinking about what I eat.  That's really about it. 

I'm not exercising AT ALL.  I have thought about it a few times.  I still drive by Concierge Gym twice a day, but I really only notice it when I'm coming home, not when I'm leaving for work.  Then I'm just trying to make sure I don't hit anyone in my mad dash to be not so late to work.  I've noticed that it's really full at night.  I see my favorite elliptical machine through the window and I realize I sort of miss it.  I can almost visualize myself on it.  I think this month I am going to might make a goal to bring workout clothes with me to work, change before leaving, and actually STOP at Concierge Gym before making it home.  We'll see. 

Well, you know we just had a New Year celebration.  Me and my skinny friends went to Orlando, FL for a 4-day-getaway.  I was up at 5-freakin-30 in the morning on Friday December 31 to make it to our carpool for the trip to the airport. 

As girls we spend the day shopping and getting last minute details done like manicures and such before arriving at our hotel to start the two (ok three) hour process of getting ready.  Three girls + 1 shower (and toilet) = Tough Times.  We all manage to survive and look fabulous before leaving for the evening.  There are at least 55 pictures of that moment to prove it.

I walked back IN the hotel room at 5:00 in the morning on Saturday January 1.  That's a champion party night, my friends.  Good times, good times.  I'm glad nights like these are only a few times a year.  There's talk of a Mardi Gras trip in the works.  None of us have ever done a proper NOLA Mardi Gras.  However.  I don't know that I'll be fully recovered from NYE by then.

As any young lady would do, I shopped for my trip.  This is in addition to all the underwears.  I don't have many options for fashion (decent fashion-emphasis on decent) being Just Another Fat Girl.  I shop quite a bit from Lane Bryant.  That's like 90% of my closet.  I score some good tops occasionally from Kohl's and Stein Mart.  Anyway, the point I want to make here is that I did some shopping for my trip.  I went to The Mall (I loathe Mall Shopping) for a mad dash on Thursday.  I needed an outfit or three for the evenings we'd be on the town. 

Apparently, LB is now carrying DKNY clothing.  It's overpriced, but I got some jeans on sale!  Suh-Weet.  And they look freakin hot on.  I should tell you, if you consider shopping for these, the Soho dark wash are the way to go.  At least on me.  They have some that are a lighter wash--which are true "jeans" to me--and they weren't flattering in the slightest.  I've got a funny shape (remember The Jiggle in the Middle?) so it might just be me. 

I also got some really, really cute tops.  The one I got for NYE was a tank-tunic (I swear is looks better than it sounds) which required something for the arms.  Well, I tried a few long sleeve button downs which just did not work.  I was getting desperate.  I was going with the gun metal grey tank with the cute bows on the neck no matter what.  Well, I do the only thing left for me to do, I ask the clerk for a Shrug.  Lord, help me. 

I've avoided these basically since I even knew what a Shrug was.  We're talking about an article of clothing that's named after poor posture.  On top of that, they fall just below the boob which is just above the belly.  This can't be flattering.  Plus, I just think they're ugly.  For the sake of the outfit, I do it.

Holy. Shit.  It works beautifully with the top!  And I look FABULOUS in the outfit.  Right down to the lushious shoes I wore that night.  And Bohhh-Nusssss, I have to buy it in a smaller size for it to fit right.  The fashion fairies were following me that day!  I love this little thing so much, I've incorporated it into a few other outfits.  Turns out a shrug is quite diverse.  

Aside from looking Smokin' all Holiday weekend, I had another positive.  I haven't changed in sizes.  I even bought two pair of new work pants while in Tourist-Town (YIKES is it ever).  I'm so tired of my baggy slacks.  Which, I should add, really aren't because of a lot of weight loss as it was from a weight gain last year that was corrected by weight loss.  I've managed to keep about 10 lbs of my 25 lbs off.

Anyway.  First day I wore them to work, I get asked like 5 times...no lie...[JAFG], you look like you've lost weight! or How much weight have you lost, [JAFG]?  To which I have to reply, I haven't lost any, I just bought some pants that fit!  You laugh, but I'm not joking.  You'd be amazed how flattering clothes are when they fit...regardless of what size they are!

So, geting back to the outlet shopping purchase of these two pairs of paints.  I pick up a pair of black Houston's (that's the cut/style) and try them on.  Fit like a glove. Completely pass the sit-down test with flying colors.  I decide that they're a steal at $30 a pop and fit so great, I run back over and pick up the same style in grey. Then, I get on a plane, manage to get my three bags (none are small) up The Stairs in ONE trip, fall down dead/take one more vaca day from work, and unpack like 4 days later. 

I pulled out the gray pair and decide to wear them (with a cute purple top and that new shrug).  I've worn the black pair already and got SO many responses [see a couple of paragraphs above] I figure it'll be even better since I've never worn gray slacks here before.  O.M.G. 

The bastards are so snug in the waist they're almost too small!   These are the EXACT same pair of pants!!!  I can wear them (and currently am at the moment) but I safetypin them instead of buttoning to make it more comfortable.   Everywhere else in these pants are fine.  The legs.  The ass.  The length.  Everything except the waist.   I think that the factory in Bangladesh where they were made (not really kidding here) put the clasps a farther apart on this pair than the other.  Explains why they were at an Outlet.   

Remember those fashion fairies that were following me that day I got the shrug?  They must have sensed my doubt.  Felt my fear.  I think that day has come back to bite me. 

So....Sorry, Shrug. I didn't mean to be a hater.

-jafg

Oh Yeah.

06/18/10

277.2 lbs

So......., I'm really just whatever about that right now.

I have something serious to share with you tonight.  I had a funky day.  Over all there was nothing remarkable about it.  Nothing good.  Nothing bad.

Yesterday, kind of randomly, I called and made an appointment to get my hair done tonight.  Cut.  I love getting my hair cut.  I find it very cathartic.  There's a joy for me to see all that hair chopped off and left on the cutting room floor.  I haven't found another stylist since I moved here.  For any self respecting girl, a stylist is a long term commitment.  I am going have a very co-dependent relationship with my stylist.  He or she will be the most intimate, constant person I will know for what could potentially be for the next decade or so.  Only financial ruin will prevent me from seeing my stylist.  I think you get the point.  I met mine tonight!

My hair looks fantastic.  It's a touch shorter than I'd like it, but it will look effing great  blow dryed straight.  I got foils thrown in at the last minute.  A lush-us caramel against my brown-black curls.  I am happy to say the least.  I was in an Aveda salon so I jumped on a madagascar candle and some product.  I then picked up some sushi and headed home.  I asked the order dude if I could buy a beer to go.  He grabs a Kirin out of the fridge and says $4.42.  I pay the guy, pack my beer in my purse and grab my sushi and head home.  I wanted a Sapporo but I decided not to push my luck.

So I get home, enjoy my sushi pop my beer and become just a little melancholy.  No reason, just did.  Well, I decided to cheer myself up and I went to my room and went to my closet to dig out the only thing after a hair stylist that would make me happy at that moment.

Shoes.

 I strap on a pair of shoes whenever I want to feel sexy.  Or just better in general.  I love walking around in 4 inches of strappy stiletto goodness.  I feel like all is right with the world again.  I never wear them outside.  Truth be known, most of them look great on but are absolutely not practical  As a matter of fact, unless I'm just simply standing or sitting, these shoes really aren't comfortable for long.  It's like I buy a "skinny shoe" or something.  It'll look good in the mirror as long as I don't bend over or, I don't know, breathe.  I will buy them anyway. 

I have a pair of very cute ones tonight and thought I'd share some of my sexiness with the internet world. 

Aren't they hot?  And with the tanned legs too.  Too bad my feet hurt.

I almost forgot.  I got my water in today!


-jafg

Roller Derby, Anyone?

06/16/10

279.2 lbs

I'm still evaluating my recently past behavior.  I am also going to the gym tonight. 

I'm still a little high from all the twitter and bloggin love I've gotten over the past few days.  I have grown to 53 followers!  I always find it to be an exciting/humbling experience when a new follower sprouts up.  I also do my best to follow you all and add you to my blogs I heart a lot list.  (If you're not on there, please let me know!).  I accidentally selected to follow myself one day--which apparently you can totally do--and now I don't want to unfollow cause I don't want to decrease my numbers.  I heart you all!  Love You Mean It!

While every comment and follower means the world to me, the love received over the picture posting was SO unexpected and encouraging!  I'll tell  you, I have a regular square-ish screen on my laptop and have a widescreen monitor on the desktop (which I use most of the time).  I posted those pictures on the regular square-ish screen machine.  I think, after seeing them on the widescreen, had I seen them on this machine first, I SO would not have posted them.  EGAD. Widescreen makes a difference.

Bygones.

So, I played laser tag last night.  And I went skating.  Yeah, skating.  Like old-school-orange-wheeled-fake-suede-horrible-shoelacey skating.  I learned a few things.  Firstly, skating rinks still smell like stinky feet and sweaty kids.  Secondly, there is no such thing as a fat skater.  I have the videos to prove it. 

Don't get me wrong.  There were some kids in there that still had a fair share of baby pudge going on.  But I'm talking a lack of Big People.  Not the parents sitting on the sidelines, but the folks out on the rink.  Most of them were under the age of 10, btw.  Then a good many of them were under the age of 15.  There was some dude there that was totally sporting the scary 70's porn mustache and I never exactly saw him with a kid.  I'm still a little concerned about that one.  Anyway, point is NONE of them were fat. 

So BB's little 15 year old brother came for a two week visit. Because of this, BB and Her Beau are trying to find "minor friendly" things to do. Last night, it was half price night at this game park. So, we piled in the car and headed for some laser tag. I've never played laser tag before. It involves a black light and 10 year old kids. I think next time I'll have a few drinks first. Of the Adult Beverage variety.


Well.  We play 2 rather fast rounds of laser tag and decide that's enough.  As we're walking out the notion hits me...How freakin fun would it be to roller skate again after like 20 years?  (Holy. Shit.  It HAS been 20 years. 8-/  )  We all head over--after a little convincing-- for the skate exchange where you give Them your shoes and They give you hideous skates.  I'm still stoked anyway.  We then sit down on the box benches (ohmawgaw, they still use those carpet covered box benches!) and begin to put on said hideous skates. 

A new notion hits me.  How freakin stupid is this idea, anyway??!!?

...Dear Lord.......Please Please Please don't let me die!...

I did survive.  I stayed on the carpet area (which was a cookie monster blue) so I'd have a little more traction on the wheels of death.  I actually made it almost completely around the rink floor once.  I was clinging with all my might to the poor 15YO's arm.  I bet he still has white marks where I was gripping so hard.  Thankfully, though, I never fell.  I also got one hell of a strength training workout for my legs.  Believe me.

It wasn't until I sat down and took the hideous skates off that I had the revalation about the fat people and skating and how there wasn't a single one of them in there besides me.  I was the biggest girl on the block, or in the rink, or whatever.  I can't tell you why I realized this and I find it a little odd that I had the thought, to be honest.  I can tell you, though, I didn't feel self conscious...not once.

I was too busy concentrating on not breaking my ass.

-jafg

Enter At Your Own Risk

09/24/09

285.5 lbs

Yikes.  I brought my workout clothes to work.  I even remembered to pack matching socks and my tennies.  Oh yeah, I did finally find my other tennie (see my flip-flop post).

I'm trying to take a break from smoking today so that I can really do ok on whatever treadmill-like machine I'll be on (I really hope I'm alone in there...).  I did that by not stopping to buy another pack last night.  What the hell was I thinking?! It's killing me.  I'm also trying to drink plenty of water and not snack at all. 

So picture it, my friends....A nicotine-fiending, food-crazed, exercise-phobia-facing woman sitting at the keyboard. 

All for the purpose of working out in public. Where people can see me. Sweating.  In Shorts. Where I Live.

Holy crap.  I need a cigarette!!



Be afraid.  Be very, very afraid.

-jafg

These Flip-Flops Are Made For Walking

08/11/09

281.0 lbs

Stepping on the scale twice is now part of my regular morning ritual.

I haven't mentioned this before but I live on the top floor of my building. It takes exactly 53 steps to get from the first stair to my door. I know because I count them often. I haven't counted this as exercise because I've been walking them long before "this project" and it's never made a dent in my weightiness.

My best friend and her husband helped move me into this place (a blessing from God, I must say). When it was all done, BF Hubbie said "OK. The next time we see you, you'll have a bikini body because of these damn stairs." They've been back three times and, believe me, there's no bikini body here.

I know exactly how much money to spend to keep the groceries to a managable 1-load trip. I also use the totes because you can get more stuffed into them and the handles will go over my shoulders. I try to avoid any extra trips because those stairs just suck. They make the stairs at work look like child's play. I walk down these stairs in the morning and back up them at night when I get home. Sometimes, I will sit in my car and think "Damn. So close yet so far away."

Well, I did something pretty crazy last night. I was flipping through channels and realized that nothing was on TV. Again. [More to Love comes on tonight] Even the reliable syndicated shows were ones I'd seen too many times to sit through again. So, I decided to go for a walk. This means an added trip down The Stairs. Well, what the hell, I want to increase my activity (the calorie consumption thing I learned the other day made me do it). So, I need to find a pair of socks. I look in my drawer and there's one lonely little white sport sock. Hmmm. I obviously haven't needed any for awhile. After digging through the pile of clothes at the foot of my bed-I lack motivation in many areas of my life-I find a pair of sport socks. Woohoo! I put them on and go to grab my tennies.

I know I've been stepping over them for a few weeks. I recently had them for a four-state marathon which I recently embarked on. By marathon, I mean driving from one state to another and then to a third and then back through the second into the fourth then back home. All in 4 days. That's another blog all on its own. I had my tennies with me because this trip involved furniture and big trucks and stuff. Turns out, I wore flip-flops the whole time so I didn't need the tennies. I got home, lived out of my suitcase for a week, and then unloaded everything. The tennies went on the floor. Well, one did, anyway.

I spent 30 minutes looking for my other shoe. I still don't know where the damn thing is. I looked under my bed 3 times. It never appeared. Oh, remarkably, under my bed is very clean. Nothing there at all. Not even a cat toy or furball. I looked under the dressing table. Nothing. I even pulled the suitcase open and, yep, no shoe. How do you lose one tennis shoe?!? I can't make this stuff up, people.

I could have been defeated. I could have just plopped back on the couch and veg'ed. I did not! I persevered! I was now determined to walk and grabbed my flip-flops. Really, these are not the best items to wear when walking for the purpose of walking. Trust me.

I was pretty active for about 45 minutes last night. I had a 5-minute search for socks and lost a 30-minute scavenger hunt for my one tennie. I took 53 steps down to the main level of the building. I went for a 10-minute stroll around the neighborhood parking lot went to the community mailbox and then back to The Stairs. I then took the 53 steps up to my door. In flip-flops. Go me.

I'm eating a little bite-size Twix right now. But one thing has nothing to do with the other.

-jafg