Happy New Year. Again. (Yea Rabbits!)

02/03/2011

???.? lbs

I know what that number is but weight is a reality that I choose not to face today.

So today is the Chinese New Year.  The Year of the Hare.  I'm a hare.  Well, really, if you read what the traits are for the hare, you'd laugh at that.  Cause they don't match up.  Except for the hyper-sexual-and-super-social part.  And who thinks rabbits are super social, anyway??

It's been over a week since my last post.  I hope you don't feel abandoned.  I do feel a little guilty.  I can't help it, though.  Things have been busy.  Firstly, the first month of the year is always MAD busy at work.  Like every last minute is usually put to something wicked productive.  Which leaves me little time to meander into JAFG land.  Then, of course, there is LDL (which is not a reference to my cholesterol levels, btw).   My glasses are definitely still steamy.  Despite all this, I decided I'm making time this morning to post. 

Those of you who have been around for the long haul know that I mostly just write about my experiences.  I don't really philosophize except to examine my own lot in life.  As the blog says, it's about my love/hate relationship with the world of weight.  Sometimes, that deals with the fit of clothing, sometimes food, sometimes exercise, a lot of times smoking...  But lately... Well, lately I've been thinking about sex.

Yes.  Sex. 

I'm nervous.  It will be 4 months since the last time (also first time) that I've spent face-to-face time with LDL, the next time I see him.  Did that make sense?  Granted we spent quality time together, but that was 4 months ago.  That's a long time.  Especially when you're talking about sex.

I can't spend more than 5 minutes of conversation time chatting with him without wanting to crawl through the phone and, well, you know.  There's still plenty of heat, but where has this nervousness come from?  My misgivings about talking to someone and then meeting them are of no consequence.  We met in person through a mutual acquaintance.  I can't say the guy isn't interested.  HE approached ME.  He also talks a pretty hot game.  So, why am I so nervous? 

Well, I talk a big game and there are certain aspects of the bedroom that I know I have no problem with, but, truth be told...I'm no expert.  There are things that even in my 35 years of living I have yet to check off my 'to-do' list.  There are things I'd like to do but feel that there are physical limitations.  How does one approach this?  How do I figure these things out without completely feeling like a fool in the heat of the moment.  And then there are the things I like.  Well, actually, I'm not so worried about that.  I know how to give directions.

So back to the point.  I'm nervous.  It's sad to say this is the longest pseudo-relationship I've had in years.  Well, since I've been in Small Southern City which has been, Lord....2 years this month!  All this time and all this distance have really allowed some healthy anticipation to mix with a lot of unhealthy doubt.  Shit. 

I am a self-saboteur.  I can recognize it (even if I haven't figured out how to completely overcome it).  So now, I'm lost in my head and trying to only focus on the goal:  Get Lucky.  I keep telling myself that none of my imaginary hype will matter.  When it's all said and done, and we're finally co-habitating the same space, I know we'll just go at it like rabbits. 

But not jack rabbits, hopefully.


-jafg

Facebook Fever and Pretty Panties

01/12/2011

283.4 lbs

I'm sticking with yesterday's guess.

I've been on Facebook as Just Another Fat Girl for awhile.  It's really weird because I get tons and tons of friend requests.  TONS and TONS.  I'm not kidding.  I had to delete over 150 friend request emails alone from my inbox.  And that doesn't include all the "fan page suggestions".  I look at these accounts and I wonder how the hell they found me.  My page only has like 31 fans.  My person account has 339.  Can I just say that I don't have that many fb friends on my super secret identity fb account?  Blows my mind.  I was thinking that most of them are like fad sales people.  Trying to pitch and whatnot, but then I look at the names and the posts and most of them are real life people.  Most of them are using Facebook for their blogging medium.  It's pretty cool.  Although, it does make it a pain in the ass to log into my jafg email account.  I'm changing my setting for friend request emails from fb.  Actually, I'm gonna do that right now...

Whew.  I'm glad I remembered I could do that.  Not kidding, in the time it took me to login and and make those changes (and just accepting like 75 friend requests before I started this post) I got another friend request.  My friend count is now at 340.  YIKES!

Well, folks, I have a Long Distance Lover. I should warn you now, I'm going to be talking about some adult stuff for the next little bit.  Nothing X-rated, but definitely over PG13.  I travel on business several times a year.  I see a lot of the same faces, but my real life work is in a large industry so the opportunity to meet new people is always there.  I met him on a late Summer trip. 

He approached me at a networking event.  That's business speak for party with free adult beverages and food.  Anyway.  I was talking to another male person for a majority of the evening (strictly platonic, I assure you) which actually garnered some attention because he's fairly high profile in my work world.  Anyway, this is how I initially met LDL.

To begin with, it was a brief meeting.  Actually, we didn't even really talk.  He was taking pictures of everyone around and--being the nice girl that I am--I offered to take his picture with Mr. Platonic.  Before an introduction to be made, he was off.  I was a little dissapointed because I really thought he was quite cute.

About an hour later, I'm getting another beverage at the bar and then suddenly, LDL is beside me handing me his card.  He tells me "I don't know what it is about you...I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since I saw you.  Please call me.  It doesn't have to be tonight, but please call me before you leave."  And then, he was off.  Again.  This is by far the best pick up line I've ever heard.  Ever.  By far.  Needless to say, I did call him.  We talked more and eventually got to know each other much better before the end of the trip.

I want to tell you that we didn't have s-e-x. (And if we would have, "protection" would have been involved.  I am a safety girl through and through. There's my PSA for the day.)


That's not to say that the opportunity wasn't there, it just didn't come to that. "It" didn't need to.  "It" was pretty phenomenal on it's own.  I don't really know what "it" was, but damn, there were sparks and fireworks.  Both he and "it" made an impression.
 
I was content in leaving "it" at that.  To be honest, I really was expecting to leave "it" at that.  I mean, we're talking different time zones here.  And then I started getting texts.  And fb messages.  And phone calls.  Not all at once, but enough to know that there was continued interest there.  Let me tell you, this part has been a lot of fun.  A lot. 

Anyway, there are plans in the works for seeing each other.  Over the holidays it was out of the question because of schedules.  Hell, right now it's hard because of schedules.  Plus we're talking serious travel commitment because it'll involve a plane.  And that's a pretty big commitment.  I'm not 100% sold on the idea of travelling just to see him or the other way around, but wouldn't mind seeing if there was still electricity the next time we happen to both be occupying the same space.

So I know I'll be see him again in a month. I'm ok with waiting considering my commitment issues.  What I have been doing in the interim is shopping.  Dear Lord, have I been shopping.  First of all, if you didn't know about Lane Bryant's buy two bras get two free sale, get to that website NOW.  It's almost over (01/17/11).  Haivng said that, I've greatly increased the size of my boudoir.  Nothing makes a girl feel sexy like pretty panties.  And bras.  And nighties.  LB even has some babydolls that have underwire built in.  Underwire!  God Bless the person who finally did that!  I have all sorts of colors now, too.  And lace.  Which can itch at times.  Just sayin.

My point with all this is that Sexy is as Sexy does.  I didn't pursue this guy, although I certainly did notice him the moment I saw him.  Even after "it" happened, he still pursued me (and is continuing to do so).  Somethin I got makes him hot.  And I'm ok with that. 

My arsenal is stocked.  I'll keep you posted.  It may just fizzle instead of sizzle.  In which case, I got new stuff out of it, anyway.

Like my favorite new pair of pretty panties:

The Coral Rumba Boyshort

For the record, I didn't model this.

-jafg

Help Wanted

07/29/10

278.6 lbs

I didn't  weigh today.  That was yesterday.

Firstly, I don't know why it's been so long since I posted!  I haven't even tweeted any pithy comments and thoughts.  I hope you all didn't completely forget I was here.  Well.  I'm still alive.  And kicking.  Figuratively speaking anyway.

I haven't exercised in weeks.  WEEKS.  I have been taking the stairs at work as often as possible.  When I'm really hot, though, I still take that elevator.  The Mom came for a visit this week and it was great to see her.  I made some effin awesome meals.  They were healthier than they could have been (I made a bechamel sauce with 1% milk rather than heavy cream or half & half).

I'm rambling at the moment.  Sorry about that.

Let's get down to business, shall we?  I need two things from you, Bloggin Buddies.  Firstly, I need some workout accountability partners and I need them stat.  I can't seem to make the choice to get moving on my own.  I know I should be, but I'm not.  It's not that I can't, but I won't and I don't have a reason why except for laziness 9or something like it anyway).  I can always find something else to do other than exercise. Damnit.  I'm even ok with opening up my super secret fat girl identity to, say, work out together virtually where I check in and out with Exercise via my nifty cellular phone texting tools.  I'm talking one-on-one here, not Twitter of Facebook.  Although, my email's blowing up with friend requests.  I need to respond to those, too.  I'm so behind on jafg stuff.  I  digress.  You see how easy that happens?  This is why I need that accountability partner.

On to Thing Two.  I signed up for Match(dot)com.  Well, I haven't paid yet, but I did post a profile.  I got three emails since starting my account last week so I think I'm gonna upgrade.

I thought I'd share my long ass bio with you people so you can tell me if I'm datable.  Cause it's been so long I forgot what you actually do on a date.  Really.  So, here goes...

You know, one of the hardest things to do is describing yourself for a dating site. Or any other interview-type situation, really. So, hmmm…Well, I love soymilk. How’s that for a beginning? :o)


I am what you might call a social butterfly. I wouldn’t say I'm the life of the party, but I certainly do love to socialize! I've got a close network of friends both here and [geographical locations omitted]

I'm serious about work and about my free time. My friends are important to me so a person that blends well with them is also important. I would also hope to fit well into his circle of friends. There's tons of [college] sports in my local crew so if that's what he's into, he'll be welcomed with open arms. While I'm not a diehard fan, I do enjoy a good sporting event. Although, I'd rather watch a [college] football game on TV rather than in person. Just so you know.

Let's just clear the air on physical appearance. I'll be the first to admit that I can appreciate a good looking guy (or girl, really. I think Scarlett Johansson has a terrific body!). I understand (and think) that there's got to be that phisycal attraction between two people. So, I want to be completely up front with you on this. I am a plus-size girl. I’m 34; it’s not news to me. I’m comfortable in my own skin, but I’m also embarking on a new healthy path. Facing 35 makes one think about these things. I joined the YMCA in June and learned that there’s nothing like getting your rear handed to you after an intense workout.

For me, genuine is key. My match will be family-oriented and independent. He'll be full of life and maybe just a bit deviant. :-) I’m really hoping to find someone that will completely appreciate me for who I am right now and will also be encouraging for where I want to be. It’s my goal to be that same person for my “person”.

If you're interested in just hanging out (which is welcomed!), or in finding out if something may click, please let me know! (I'm not upgrading my account until I know there is some interest.)


Oh, and I’ve got to be honest with you here, I’m usually about 15-20 minutes behind schedule. Well, that’s true as long as “usually” means always.

Other than that, I wish you the best of luck in your search!

Cheers!

Well, there you have it.  Let me know what you really think about this.  Also, I need that virtual workout buddy. 

My new dating life depends on it.

-jafg


P.S.: 
Katy at Project Look Good Naked gave me a Versatile Blogger award!  Forever I never get an award and now, I get two in one month!

Thank you Katy!


P. P. S.:
Holy. Timeline.  I just realized that I celebrated my 1 year bloggin anniversary.  Like, literally.  Just Now.  Celebrate with me by reading that first one again.