A Very Stylish Girl

01/14/2011

283.6 lbs

That's for real this time.

I did two amazing things this morning:  I weighed myself and I got to work on time!  Well, by 5 after 8.  That's pretty much on time.  Especially for me.

So it's obvious that I'm not really doing anything to lose weight right now.  I'm moderately thinking about what I eat, but that's about it.  Mostly that includes not ordering anything with sugar.  I don't care so much about the fat.  Or carbs.  Actually,....that might not be so true.  I have consumed a fair amount of Jack and Coke.  So.  I'm minimally thinking about what I eat.  That's really about it. 

I'm not exercising AT ALL.  I have thought about it a few times.  I still drive by Concierge Gym twice a day, but I really only notice it when I'm coming home, not when I'm leaving for work.  Then I'm just trying to make sure I don't hit anyone in my mad dash to be not so late to work.  I've noticed that it's really full at night.  I see my favorite elliptical machine through the window and I realize I sort of miss it.  I can almost visualize myself on it.  I think this month I am going to might make a goal to bring workout clothes with me to work, change before leaving, and actually STOP at Concierge Gym before making it home.  We'll see. 

Well, you know we just had a New Year celebration.  Me and my skinny friends went to Orlando, FL for a 4-day-getaway.  I was up at 5-freakin-30 in the morning on Friday December 31 to make it to our carpool for the trip to the airport. 

As girls we spend the day shopping and getting last minute details done like manicures and such before arriving at our hotel to start the two (ok three) hour process of getting ready.  Three girls + 1 shower (and toilet) = Tough Times.  We all manage to survive and look fabulous before leaving for the evening.  There are at least 55 pictures of that moment to prove it.

I walked back IN the hotel room at 5:00 in the morning on Saturday January 1.  That's a champion party night, my friends.  Good times, good times.  I'm glad nights like these are only a few times a year.  There's talk of a Mardi Gras trip in the works.  None of us have ever done a proper NOLA Mardi Gras.  However.  I don't know that I'll be fully recovered from NYE by then.

As any young lady would do, I shopped for my trip.  This is in addition to all the underwears.  I don't have many options for fashion (decent fashion-emphasis on decent) being Just Another Fat Girl.  I shop quite a bit from Lane Bryant.  That's like 90% of my closet.  I score some good tops occasionally from Kohl's and Stein Mart.  Anyway, the point I want to make here is that I did some shopping for my trip.  I went to The Mall (I loathe Mall Shopping) for a mad dash on Thursday.  I needed an outfit or three for the evenings we'd be on the town. 

Apparently, LB is now carrying DKNY clothing.  It's overpriced, but I got some jeans on sale!  Suh-Weet.  And they look freakin hot on.  I should tell you, if you consider shopping for these, the Soho dark wash are the way to go.  At least on me.  They have some that are a lighter wash--which are true "jeans" to me--and they weren't flattering in the slightest.  I've got a funny shape (remember The Jiggle in the Middle?) so it might just be me. 

I also got some really, really cute tops.  The one I got for NYE was a tank-tunic (I swear is looks better than it sounds) which required something for the arms.  Well, I tried a few long sleeve button downs which just did not work.  I was getting desperate.  I was going with the gun metal grey tank with the cute bows on the neck no matter what.  Well, I do the only thing left for me to do, I ask the clerk for a Shrug.  Lord, help me. 

I've avoided these basically since I even knew what a Shrug was.  We're talking about an article of clothing that's named after poor posture.  On top of that, they fall just below the boob which is just above the belly.  This can't be flattering.  Plus, I just think they're ugly.  For the sake of the outfit, I do it.

Holy. Shit.  It works beautifully with the top!  And I look FABULOUS in the outfit.  Right down to the lushious shoes I wore that night.  And Bohhh-Nusssss, I have to buy it in a smaller size for it to fit right.  The fashion fairies were following me that day!  I love this little thing so much, I've incorporated it into a few other outfits.  Turns out a shrug is quite diverse.  

Aside from looking Smokin' all Holiday weekend, I had another positive.  I haven't changed in sizes.  I even bought two pair of new work pants while in Tourist-Town (YIKES is it ever).  I'm so tired of my baggy slacks.  Which, I should add, really aren't because of a lot of weight loss as it was from a weight gain last year that was corrected by weight loss.  I've managed to keep about 10 lbs of my 25 lbs off.

Anyway.  First day I wore them to work, I get asked like 5 times...no lie...[JAFG], you look like you've lost weight! or How much weight have you lost, [JAFG]?  To which I have to reply, I haven't lost any, I just bought some pants that fit!  You laugh, but I'm not joking.  You'd be amazed how flattering clothes are when they fit...regardless of what size they are!

So, geting back to the outlet shopping purchase of these two pairs of paints.  I pick up a pair of black Houston's (that's the cut/style) and try them on.  Fit like a glove. Completely pass the sit-down test with flying colors.  I decide that they're a steal at $30 a pop and fit so great, I run back over and pick up the same style in grey. Then, I get on a plane, manage to get my three bags (none are small) up The Stairs in ONE trip, fall down dead/take one more vaca day from work, and unpack like 4 days later. 

I pulled out the gray pair and decide to wear them (with a cute purple top and that new shrug).  I've worn the black pair already and got SO many responses [see a couple of paragraphs above] I figure it'll be even better since I've never worn gray slacks here before.  O.M.G. 

The bastards are so snug in the waist they're almost too small!   These are the EXACT same pair of pants!!!  I can wear them (and currently am at the moment) but I safetypin them instead of buttoning to make it more comfortable.   Everywhere else in these pants are fine.  The legs.  The ass.  The length.  Everything except the waist.   I think that the factory in Bangladesh where they were made (not really kidding here) put the clasps a farther apart on this pair than the other.  Explains why they were at an Outlet.   

Remember those fashion fairies that were following me that day I got the shrug?  They must have sensed my doubt.  Felt my fear.  I think that day has come back to bite me. 

So....Sorry, Shrug. I didn't mean to be a hater.

-jafg

Facebook Fever and Pretty Panties

01/12/2011

283.4 lbs

I'm sticking with yesterday's guess.

I've been on Facebook as Just Another Fat Girl for awhile.  It's really weird because I get tons and tons of friend requests.  TONS and TONS.  I'm not kidding.  I had to delete over 150 friend request emails alone from my inbox.  And that doesn't include all the "fan page suggestions".  I look at these accounts and I wonder how the hell they found me.  My page only has like 31 fans.  My person account has 339.  Can I just say that I don't have that many fb friends on my super secret identity fb account?  Blows my mind.  I was thinking that most of them are like fad sales people.  Trying to pitch and whatnot, but then I look at the names and the posts and most of them are real life people.  Most of them are using Facebook for their blogging medium.  It's pretty cool.  Although, it does make it a pain in the ass to log into my jafg email account.  I'm changing my setting for friend request emails from fb.  Actually, I'm gonna do that right now...

Whew.  I'm glad I remembered I could do that.  Not kidding, in the time it took me to login and and make those changes (and just accepting like 75 friend requests before I started this post) I got another friend request.  My friend count is now at 340.  YIKES!

Well, folks, I have a Long Distance Lover. I should warn you now, I'm going to be talking about some adult stuff for the next little bit.  Nothing X-rated, but definitely over PG13.  I travel on business several times a year.  I see a lot of the same faces, but my real life work is in a large industry so the opportunity to meet new people is always there.  I met him on a late Summer trip. 

He approached me at a networking event.  That's business speak for party with free adult beverages and food.  Anyway.  I was talking to another male person for a majority of the evening (strictly platonic, I assure you) which actually garnered some attention because he's fairly high profile in my work world.  Anyway, this is how I initially met LDL.

To begin with, it was a brief meeting.  Actually, we didn't even really talk.  He was taking pictures of everyone around and--being the nice girl that I am--I offered to take his picture with Mr. Platonic.  Before an introduction to be made, he was off.  I was a little dissapointed because I really thought he was quite cute.

About an hour later, I'm getting another beverage at the bar and then suddenly, LDL is beside me handing me his card.  He tells me "I don't know what it is about you...I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since I saw you.  Please call me.  It doesn't have to be tonight, but please call me before you leave."  And then, he was off.  Again.  This is by far the best pick up line I've ever heard.  Ever.  By far.  Needless to say, I did call him.  We talked more and eventually got to know each other much better before the end of the trip.

I want to tell you that we didn't have s-e-x. (And if we would have, "protection" would have been involved.  I am a safety girl through and through. There's my PSA for the day.)


That's not to say that the opportunity wasn't there, it just didn't come to that. "It" didn't need to.  "It" was pretty phenomenal on it's own.  I don't really know what "it" was, but damn, there were sparks and fireworks.  Both he and "it" made an impression.
 
I was content in leaving "it" at that.  To be honest, I really was expecting to leave "it" at that.  I mean, we're talking different time zones here.  And then I started getting texts.  And fb messages.  And phone calls.  Not all at once, but enough to know that there was continued interest there.  Let me tell you, this part has been a lot of fun.  A lot. 

Anyway, there are plans in the works for seeing each other.  Over the holidays it was out of the question because of schedules.  Hell, right now it's hard because of schedules.  Plus we're talking serious travel commitment because it'll involve a plane.  And that's a pretty big commitment.  I'm not 100% sold on the idea of travelling just to see him or the other way around, but wouldn't mind seeing if there was still electricity the next time we happen to both be occupying the same space.

So I know I'll be see him again in a month. I'm ok with waiting considering my commitment issues.  What I have been doing in the interim is shopping.  Dear Lord, have I been shopping.  First of all, if you didn't know about Lane Bryant's buy two bras get two free sale, get to that website NOW.  It's almost over (01/17/11).  Haivng said that, I've greatly increased the size of my boudoir.  Nothing makes a girl feel sexy like pretty panties.  And bras.  And nighties.  LB even has some babydolls that have underwire built in.  Underwire!  God Bless the person who finally did that!  I have all sorts of colors now, too.  And lace.  Which can itch at times.  Just sayin.

My point with all this is that Sexy is as Sexy does.  I didn't pursue this guy, although I certainly did notice him the moment I saw him.  Even after "it" happened, he still pursued me (and is continuing to do so).  Somethin I got makes him hot.  And I'm ok with that. 

My arsenal is stocked.  I'll keep you posted.  It may just fizzle instead of sizzle.  In which case, I got new stuff out of it, anyway.

Like my favorite new pair of pretty panties:

The Coral Rumba Boyshort

For the record, I didn't model this.

-jafg

Failure Is Not An Option Except in Fashion

08/13/10

275.5 lbs

I had that coming.  Without regaling you with all the gory details, I consumed about 2400 calories yesterday and had no extracurricular activities.  Half of those were after 8:00pm.  Shame on me.

Happy Friday The 13th, Y'all!  Let the good times roll!  The bachelorette party is this weekend.  It kicks off tomorrow at 10:00am when we hit the road and goes until we come home Sunday afternoon.  I may be a little concerned.  SAG and I went out and bought party favors for the evening.  Cheesey little things that will totally make us all the cliche of the evening.  It is going to be SO much fun!  I even bought some new clothes.

I went to three stores last night:  Avenue, Steinmart and Kohl's.  I struck out at Avenue.  More times than not, I do.  But, they've got cheap big-girl clothes and when they work, they really work.   I tried a lot of clothes on and this is the first time I've done that since my 20 lb drop.  I hit my closet up and have a few new things that work great, but I haven't gone shopping.  This was a pleasant surprise.  I can almost fit comfortably in 22/24 clothes.  I was pushing a 28.  Twenty. Eight.  Sheesh. 

I can get the clothes on, but they are still snug enough that they don't pass the sit-down test.  When I try a top I always have to sit down.  If it looks good when I'm sitting (refering to the jiggle in the middle) then the top is a keeper.  If it doesn't and I'm not going to be standing all night, well, I don't buy it.  Same goes with pants. 

Anyway.  I wanted to tell you all that I even tried on a dress.  I haven't worn a dress since I was forced to wear one as MOH for BFF's wedding in 2005.  That's also the lowest I can remember my weight in a long time being 265 lbs.  And since it was a Bridesmaid dress, I don't know that it counts.  Well, I really want to wear a dress for BB and Her Beau's wedding in early October.  So I figured I better try one on and see what it looks like.  It wasn't for the wedding, it was just for casual wear.  It was like a tanktop with wide straps at the top.  Just below the bust line it had a large elastic-gathered band (same material, just all gathered and elasticized) and then the material fell to just below my knee.  It was a 22/24.  A bit snug really.  While everything did work, I needed a size larger for the elastic.  The way it fell made me look 20 months pregnant.  Ungood.  I wasn't discouraged because I actually got a 22/24 on my body.  Anyway, after an hour I walked out of Avenue empty-handed and headed to Steinmart.

Steinmart was so much more productive and was less time.  I was also more willing to pick up smaller sized clothings this trip.  It's usually hard to find anything there because they only go to 24 or 3x.  I've gotten 3x tops but never found anything else of interest or that would work.  Well...this time I found several tops and even a dress that had great wedding potential.  It was a 24, but I figured if it worked but was just a little snug, I'd still get it anyway. I went to the dressing room with all my found treasures--we're talking a serious armful here--and the freakin place was under construction and therefore not available.  Damnit.  So, I reviewed everything I had and kept the dress and two tops.  I'd try everyting on at home and take back what didn't work.  One of the two tops is a sure thing, the other is going to the alterations today to see if they can do a quick change on it and the dress is a no go.  Simply put, I didn't fill it out where I should and did where I shouldn't.  Bygones. 

Kohl's was good too.  I found a shirt that flattered my bustline like nothing ever has before.  It is made to fall perfectly in the back and front while it is a plunging neckline and hugs The Girls.  I felt sexy in this top.  The only thing is it doesn't pass the sit-down test.  It will, but I have to fidgit around quite a bit to make it happen.  Plus I've decided to wear a pair of black capris which are slightly too tight in the waist (will help prevent overeating and they look very flattering when I stand) so the combination may be too much.  I bought it anyway.  I want to wear this top SO bad this weekend.  I just don't want to be one of those fat girls who wears skin-tight clothes and has rolls hanging out everywhere.  You know which ones I'm talking about.  I mean, I am all about loving yourself and being comfortable in your own skin, but there is such a thing as fashion sense. Come on, already!  Look in a mirror and get a clue. 

If I decide that the combination is a no-go, well, I can take solice in the fact that I will be able to wear it in the very near future.  Very near.  Like on my trip to Chicago in October.  Woohoo!

As I look back over the past two weeks I realize a lot of what I've been reading and even in my own experience is about not meeting challenges either set forth by ourselves or others have given us.  Failing.  I've been saying there is no such thing as Failing, it's just modified planning.

After my little rant about fat girls and too-tight clothes...I stand corrected.


-jafg

Twenty LBS Ago

06/22/10

276.6  lbs

I'm at peace with this today.


I was contemplating as I waited for the scale to reveal its verdict this morning.  It was a quick revelation, really.  I have this 275 number in my head that I keep saying over and over again like some meditative mantra.  I was so focused on it in fact that I totally let another realization slip right by. 

I have lost 20 lbs since March.  20 LBS!!!!!  I am very happy right now.  I just updated my weight tracker (from skinnyr.com at the bottom of this blog) and my trend line is steadily decreasing.  Twenty lbs ago, I was 3 little lbs away from 300 lbs.  Today, I'm lighter than I've been since 2005.  Awesome!

So, yesterday was the Summer Solstice.  The longest day of the year.  I celebrated by sweating my ass off in Concierge Gym.  (Yes, that is an indirect way of saying I didn't go to Yoga.  Screw Yoga.  At least for now).  I was only able to get 20 minutes logged on the elliptical (it was too hot; I was having problems keeping my breathing controlled) but I also got in 30 hard minutes on the circuit machines.  I pushed myself a little more on the thigh one (feeling a little "groin groan" today) and had some really good sets on the back pushing machine and it's partner.  I don't know what they're called, but supposedly they work out the back muscles.  They feel like a funky sit-up or crunch machine to me.  I wasn't able to get to the arm workouts because my clothes were soaking wet.  Seriously, I could almost wring my shirt out. 

I'm considering some skimpier workout clothes.  I fully understand now why everyone wears tiny little things and why most of the time they're skin tight.  It's easier to work out.  And cooler.  I had rolled up my capri JMS (that's Just My Size) cotton workout bottoms and rolled my sleeves up of my two-sizes-too-big JMS Tee and tucked them into my fantab sports bra (Champion @ JMS.com).  I really considered stripping my uppers to just said sports bra.  Maybe not considered, but just serious wishful thinking.


I'm committed to @SuziStorm's Crunchy Crackhead Craziness and Gun Show.  It involves doing crunches and push-ups which started on Sunday.  Truth be known, I've not done either, yet.  I don't do them ever.  At all.  So, my goal is to get a set in this week.  Just one.  I'm working up to it.  I am really hoping tonight'll be the night.  I don't think I'll be hitting the gym tonight in that heat, so I'll have no excuse but to participate in the mayhem.  I don't have the best of lower backs, so I'll be placing a pillow just above my butt to lay on.  I don't think that's cheating, is it?  It doesn't matter, I'll be doing it anyway.

Ok, I'm signing off now.

Twenty LBS lighter.

-jafg

I Can't Believe I'm Doing This

06/14/10 (still)

276.4 lbs

So, I got a request to post some real pics of me and my bathing suits.  Well, I decided to do it.  I guess I figure that if I can be at the pool, I can show you crazy kids, too.  So...here goes...

 

Ok.  I did it.  I can't believe it, but I did.

That wasn't so bad!  Maybe the next ones will be naked. 

Yeah.  Just kidding.

-jafg

 

W.I.D.T.H.! (I'm Finally Famous...Sort Of)

06/14/10

277.4 lbs

Just yesterday the scale said 276.6 lbs.  I have decided to make 275 lbs a goal for this week.  Wish me luck!

Ok.  So We've established I was out of town last week and the week before.  Well, I was featured in Jack Sh*t's W.I.D.T.H. post on June 2! (Find that post here ==> WIDTH A Little Help From My Friends.  I'm the 4th one down, you can't miss me...)  I haven't been this excited since he actually posted a comment on my blog last year!  (Find that post here ==> I Think Therefore I Can't?. Side note, I've come a long way, Baby!) 

I didn't discover this until I ran to my internet upon my return home Tuesday.  It was like getting a Christmas present that you hope you'll get, but aren't too sure you've been good enough throughout the year.  I feel famous now. 

Onto other equally exciting news...

I have almost won the bathing suit challenge!  YAH-HOOOOO!  I told you a few weeks ago that I made yet another bathing suit purchase; this one from Land's End.  Can I just say they rock?  I opted for a two-piece which still baffles and befuddles me.  I've mentioned in other postings that, even though I am a plus-sized shopper, I do not have a plus-sized bust.  This is really aggrivating when shopping for a bathing suit.  I have enough to merritt underwire, but not enough to merritt a large cup area.  I just need a normal size C-cup.  When I buy a suit by the bra size, I end up with like a size 16 fit which isn't physically possible at the moment (<== like how I choose to stay postive here?) When I try just the "soft cup" one-piece The Girls just hang in not flattering ways.  You see, perkiness just isn't part of the picture anymore. 

Anyway.  I decided to buy separates so I can specify a smaller top size to a lager bottom size.  It totally worked.  The girl swim shorts are a good fit as long as I'm not sitting at a 90* angle and one of the two tops fits superbly while the onter one will be nice for a little later this season (said optimistically).  They're both the same size (in theory) but one's a halter and fits differently.  I love it, but I'm new to halters so it's an adjustment.  I'll be keeping that one for later this summer.  My suits were delivered on  Thursday.

Aren't they cute??

Moms and I went to Concierge Gym on Sunday.  She did two miles on the recumbent and decided to go to the pool while I finished up on the elliptical and weight/circuit machines.  I got in a 50 minute workout that felt GOOD.  I found her wading around so I took off the tennies sat down and put my feet in the water.  Heaven.  It was great.  It occured to me that I had only gone swimming once while on vacation and that just wasn't setting right with the soul.  There weren't many people around and I kept thinking "I could have gone and gotten my suit on and been back by now".  By time I got to round three of that train of thought I'd had enough and went to change. 

I decided to throw on my new suit (that's the solid black top, not the vine halter).  I pull some shorts over my shorts, throw on my white button-down I use as a summer cover-up slather on a decent layer of sun-screen (I am a firm believer in protecting your skin in the sun), grab towels and the sun-screen bottles and head down to the pool.  All in all, it took me about 15 minutes.  I walked right in, took off my top layer of shorts, the button-down-cover-up and walked head held high (but still looking down so I didn't miss any steps) into the pool.  What a triumphant moment!  To top it off, I stayed in when cute boys came in.  I didn't mind when they ended up at the spots next to ours.  I was a little uncomfortable, but I didn't let me get too worked up, after all, I have a great tan right now.  I get out, maneuver to put more sun-screen on, and totally lay out all exposed-like on my chair!  To top it off, I totally manage to get an invitation to a White Party happening in the not so distant future from the cutest one.

At the end of pool time, I get up, pull on my button-down shirt and walk out.  I didn't even pull on the second layer of shorts!  I'm so very proud of me.  This losing weight business has boosted my confidence in ways I didn't even know needed to be done. 

That's just another reason Why I Do This Here...

-jafg

Giddy Up

04/28/2010

284.2 lbs

I feel a difference in my clothes.  I got all excited because I found these workout shorts I bought at the end of last year to sleep in.  I brought them with me to BFF's house over New Year's and totally left them in the suitcase.  I used that suitcase for the SAG Birthday Bash trip and found the shorts!  They totally fit differently too!  They don't "hug" my jiggle in the middle if you know what I mean.  I totally heart them.  I wore them Monday to workout at HHH class.  It was great.  I'm totally morphing into one of those gym people.  Isn't it great?

I got home last night and thought, "I need some sort of activity".  So, I changed and immediately went to Concierge Gym.  When I got there, it was inhabited by three guys and two girls.  Eh. I can do this.  I really prefer to be the only one there and then let people come in.  I always feel like all eyes are on me when I walk into a room involving fitness.  I mean, come on.  You know you look at who walks through the door and you know, no matter how small or fleeting it might be, there's always a quick assessment of the person.  Well, anyway.  I just hate walking in to a room with workout people.  So, I did it anyway.

I walk with great determination up to my fave elliptical machine and get ready/prepped to start on it.  I'm plugging in my earbuds to my Droid and set the Pandora station to my fave workout one "Rage Against The Machine"  You gotta get that station.  All you have to do is select Rage Against the Machine.  It plays some great stuff if it's what you're into...If you don't have Pandora, you should totally get it.  There's have an app for that on the Droid and for the iPhone. Or iPod Touch.

Ok, I have the music playing, I am getting on the machine and setting my pace, level, stride, and other settings (I run on Manual).  I usually hit about 68-73 strides per minute.  Sometimes it goes faster when Nine Inch Nails plays...but there's no telling when that'll come into rotation.  Now, you may not think that's very much, but for this JAFG it's a freakin sprint.  I usually do this for 20 minutes.  The last 2 minutes usually kill me.  Or make me think it's killing me anyway.  Once I'm done with that, I hit the circuit machines (or resistance or weights or whatever those toture devices are called) for 30 minutes.  That's my full workout when I'm not hitting HHH class.  Back to the music.  I am getting on the machine and I begin to increase my strides.  I am wearing my newly found shorts again (becuase I can).  The more I increase speed, the more these damn shorts are riding up between my always touching thighs.  I'd like to make this more glamorized, but there's nothing attractive about it. 

Concierge Gym is not the biggest area and the machines sit right up against the wall.  The mirrored wall.  So while I'm trying to pretend that I don't have some funky new triangle cut shorts on, I can see in the mirror exactly what I look like from the front.  And that's with the front of the elliptical in between me and the mirror.  Horror upon horrors.  Imagine what I must look like from the back!!!

So, I am casually reaching down and pulling my shorts out of the crevice of my thighs.  It's not the easiest thing to do while on this machine.  I am trying to adjust my stride, my speed, all sorts of things so these damn things don't ride up on me.  I'm no longer being subtle now.  I can't go the pace I want to go because I keep having to stop and adjust the shorts.  I know I'm gonna be some water cooler joke somewhere because I almost fell one time trying to rescue them from the thighs.  Finally, I got the pace down to 48-55 strides per minute and the feet positioned in the right place and was holding my head in the right position.  The riding stopped.  Yahoo!

So I'm a little disappointed with this slower pace.  It's not what I'm used to doing.  I figured that I would increase my level from the 5 I normally go to 14 which is as high as it would go.  I think, in the world of ellipticals, this would be knee-breaking, but my machine is super duper easy and even the level 14 doesn't kill me like the level 3 does on some other ones.  I love that machine, though.  I can do a quicker pace and really feel like I'm accomplishing something since my muscles don't feel like they are going to burn through my skin like acid the instant I get started.  This machine actually lets me move a little bit before that kicks in.

I decided to double my time from 20 to 40 minutes. I also decided to skip the weight machines since I was wearing the shorts.

One wardrobe malfunction was enough.




-jafg

Preparing for BATTLE

04/20/10

288.2 lbs

Yesterday it said 287.  That'll teach me not to blog when I lose poundage.

So I've been working out with SAG and BB for a few weeks now.  It's pretty cool.  I actually joined the Gym on Friday and worked out as a new member.  With SAG.  And I think she's kinda impressed that I can mostly push through the panting and the puffing when trying to keep up with her.  She will run you ragg-ed.  And she likes it.  Like that Jillian chick from Biggest Loser.  I am very un-fond of them both.

Workout clothes are not something that's been part of my wardrobe.  Ever.  I have been wearing either pajamas (pj pants with a big shirt) or  a pair of khaki shorts that come down to my knees and polo shirts for workout sessions with the girls and the hip-hop hell class.  Which, btw, I went to last night.  I was literally stiff as a board when I got home.  And that is after draining all the hot water in the abode on my aching back.  Bless my heart. 

Anyway.  After about two weeks of the boobs bouncing in ways that no boobs should ever bounce, I went on a hunt for a sports bra.  Actually, let's step this back one minute.  The first thing I noticed after realizing that all the ladies and the few guys that are in HHH class are already damn fit was the fact that everyone wears the little anklet socks.  I, on the other hand, have the cute little socks that come up over my ankles and almost up my calf.  Now, before you get some nerd-like image of me in my knee length shorts and knee high socks, these are just the type that I would "slouch" a bit.  I'm not trying to win fit fashion awards, but I don't want to look like an out-of-date idoit either.  After all, I am a very fashionable girl otherwise.  Over the weekend I bought some just-below-the-ankle socks.  I felt very happy about it.  Fashionable even.  One less thing that separates me from the other fit fashionistas in my HHH class. 

Ok.  Back to the boobs.  I've been eyeing this bathing suit with underwire on Just My Size and decided to search for sports bras and other work out gears. I found some great bras on this site (even thogh the regular everyday bras don't do much for me) and they were running a buy two get one free deal.  The bathing suit was on sale too.  Being the frugal shopper that I am, I went ahead and made the buy.  I got them in the mail yesterday (delivered to work) and immediately went to the bathroom to try them on.  I hate, hate, hate the bathing suit.  I heart, heart, heart my sports bras.  I got two Champion bras (same model different colors...I'm original like that) and one Glamorize bra with a faux-chami built in. 

These are not attractive items of clothing.  These are not figure-flattering-curve-accentuating things.  These are pieces of armour one puts on when preparing to do battle with HHH class.  I had a whole new level confidence walking into class last night.  My Bras and Socks were giving me super powers and a sense of invinsability.  That coupled with the fact that I found a spot where there is no mirror on the wall made me feel AWESOME.  All I could think about was jumping up and down and moving side to side while trying to shake my ass the way the instructor does.  I was looking forward to it.  While my boobs didn't budge, other parts of me sure did.  Good Lord.  Do they make a sports bra for a stomach??

Oh.  And I got a damn blister on my ankle.

-jafg

Sláinte!

03/17/10

293 lbs

I'm partying tonight.  Don't worry, I've got tomorrow off and cab money for the ride home.

Be safe! Have Fun! Go Green!

-jafg

Back From The Ends of The Earth. Sort Of.

03/16/0910

293 lbs. 

Let me start off by saying this:  No, I'm not dead.

I didn't go crazy or get maimed by a pack of bears.  I am still JAFG (plus some).  I simply got busy and like most of my diet expiditions, I relapsed by not putting the effort into blogging.  Shame on me.

I missed you people! I can't tell you how many times I started titles in my head, how many paragraphs were penned in my brain, how many times I went to get on the computer to post and then...I just got side tracked. Or, worse yet, just said "I'll do it later". Kinda like when I'm gonna lose weight. Later. Tomorrow. In this case, my tomorrow turned into almost 6 months!

A whole lot of nothing much has been going on. 

I went up a dress size (like I wear dresses...ha!) and I bought a Wii.  Yeah, I don't believe it either, but I did.  Currently, it's sitting at SAG's house (she sold hers, but not to me) from a Wii party.  Long story.

I tried to buy a "fitted just for you" bra and it was an experience to say the least. 

I think I went on a date, but I hope not. 

I bought a new fantabulous wardrobe and got even more fantabulous "deconstructed" jeans.  Back in the day, we just called them ripped.

I have several friends getting married or having babies. 

I thought about a personal trainer and couldn't afford extra $500 a month.  I am still teetering on the idea of joining a gym, but we all know how that went last time. 

I've had more adult beverages than I'd care to talk about.

Bygones.

I hope I haven't shocked you all too much or thrown off the world's rotation or anything.  I am jumping back on the horse's bandwagon or something like that.

I'm gonna have to work on my cliche' use.  I can already tell. 

-jafg

Something Wicked This Way Comes......

10/08/09

284.8 lbs

WTH?

I am SO excited about Halloween.  About the whole upcoming holiday season really.  It starts with my Birthday and rolls through New Year's.  I really love Halloween though.  I read once that as the holiday grew in popularity in the 60's our parents passed that holiday fun-lovin gene down through the 70's and 80's and 90's (even with the razorblade in the apple stuff-which, btw, has never really happened) and basically we GenXers and generations that followed have just brought it with us up into adulthood.  I mean, who doesn't love dressing up like an idiot and making merriment all night?

That's me in that picture in case you're wondering.  I figured since I'm sporting my super fantastic 60's-pink-bobbed-hair wig, I could consider my JAFG super secret identity still intact.  I'm also wearing a tiara, but that's not really part of the costume since I'll wear it pretty much whenever I want. 

I'm not sure what costume I'll come up with this year.  I love going to costume shops and finding great stuff.  I'm not talking Party City either.  I'm talking Theater shops with quality garb.  Stuff that you know won't fall apart by night's end.  I wouldn't mind finding another fantastic wig to add to the collection.  Last year was fun in that Pink Wig.  People loved it. Hell, I loved it!  I even bought one of those styrofoam heads for it to sit on. 

One year BFF and I went to Salem, Mass for Halloween.  Talk about AWESOME.  It's like Mardi Gras in NOLA without all the vomit and other human excriment everywhere.  Which is kinda nice when you think about it.  Actually, if you were caught with a beverage on the street in Salem, you'd be ticketed by the police.  BFF and I did buy some Absynthe online from Europe.  It didn't do a damn thing.  Stupid Green Fairy Tale!   Ooohhh.  Green Fairy.  That's an idea, isn't it?  I wonder how I can pull that off....

I'm going back to Southern City for the holiday to play with my hometown friends.  Who knows what kind of frightful fun we'll find.  I can't wait to go out and laugh make fun of all the craziness that will ensue.  Pictures from Halloween are the best.  Even though all the girls are dressed so trampy.  Oh wait, how's that different from any other Saturday night?


-jafg

The Blondes and SAG

09/01/09

285.2 lbs

--yesterday's weight--

Sometimes I'm at a loss for words.  Like today for example.  For my faithful few, however, I will do my best.

I went out with Skinny Athletic Girl and the Blondes Saturday night.  I had a blast!  Heard a great band, played Darts, I totally suck at Darts, btw, and drank Michelob Ultra.  I'm not a big beer fan but this wasn't too bad.  Plus it's supposedly a low carb, lower calorie beer.  So, what the hell, right? 

I had a decent hair night and the make-up looked great.  I was pretty happy with the outfit, a nice purple top with jeans and cute shoes.  Jewelry was rockin as always.  Overall, I walked out of my diggs with a pretty healthy chunk of postive energy. 

I'm mostly on time when I arrive and SAG's house.  More positive energy.  She opens the door and Damn.  She's 5'11" and is all legs.  The fitted dress she wore barely came below her "bum".  I couldn't fault her for it because she looked H-O-T.  I'd like to look that H-O-T one day!  If I had a body like hers, I would totally dress like that just to pick soymilk up from the grocery.  I would.

To make matters worse, she's gotten the P90X thing and is talking about her workouts and how sore she is.  Of course, I'm thinking I should be sore from working out, not her.  She says she's finally getting definition in her calves to which I reply "Finally?".  I couldn't help it. 

I found out what the P90X thing is...it's a 90-day regiment of complete muscle confusion.  It's supposed to really smack your body out of and into shape.  I know a Bride who's currently on the program.  She's always on Facebook about it.  It's tiresome really.  The status updates, not the plan.  Well, maybe the plan, too, but I wouldn't know.  I don't use it. 

The Blondes arrived and thank GAWD they are not wearing skimpy dresses.  The Blondes could totally wear little skimpy dresses, I assure you.  Oh--I call them The Blondes because I'm not blonde and they are...I can't reveal much more than that to protect my secret Fat Girl identity.  Anyway, The Blondes are wearing jeans and tops, all looking much more fetching in their clothes than I am.  But, I do have a great hair accessory.  Kudos for me.

We're out for the evening having a grand old time.  We all love the band.  Great band!  Wish I could share the name, but alas, I've got my secret identity to think about.  Close to closing time, we head up to After-Hours bar.  This place seems like a good idea at the time everybody's saying "Yeah, let's go!" but they're not.  They're really not. 

Every drunk girl and boy out on a Saturday night happen to be at After-Hours bar.  We're all packed in like Sardines.  It's horrible.  Really.  I'm separated from my posse by a sea of entering and exiting drunkards.  I'm being felt up by some dude sitting by a chick too drunk to notice.  Sounds like fun, doesn't it? 

Continuing with the story...I finally make it across the great divide and perch at the bar feeling a little safer.  You can smoke in this club so both service and an ashtray are immediately available. It doesn't get much better than that.  We're all pretty content, SAG and The Blondes have latched on to two guys.  These are former "friends" of SAG.  Conversation is flowing.  Then, the boys have a few friends join them.  This is the moment I stop enjoying myself. 

All the sudden these three asses wedge themselves between me and The Blondes and I get completely shut out.  Don't misunderstand me.  I really don't care about the attention or lack thereof, I care about the complete lack of acknowledgement that I was even part of this group.  Why don't these boys do the decent thing and pretend to include me in the convo?  Well, I did the only thing a respectable girl could do in my position.  I lit another cigarette and let it billow in their faces.  I was going to accidentally burn them, but I didn't get the opportunity.  My girls saved me.  These skinny girls walked away from their fanclub and pulled me with them.  Now that's cool.

It may seem like I don't like SAG and The Blondes, but that isn't true.  They're my peeps.  I heart them!  Besides, even if I were on the same level of H-O-T-ness as they are, which I am already in my own way, there'd still be something to bitch about.  We're girls.  It's what we do.


-jafg

I Need A Good 12-Step. Really.

08/24/09

285.4 lbs

That's from Saturday. It probably a little higher today, though.

Hello, blogging buddies. Did you miss me? It's been almost a week since my last confession. I mean blogpost. I'm feeling a little shameful about it.

I have been in the most funkiest funk. It started last week. I hit a metaphorical brick wall and am still kinda licking my wounds. Poor me. I crawled in bed at 5:00pm on Thursday and didn't get out until 10:00am Friday. And then I slept most of the day Friday, too. Saturday was a little better. I got out and saw Julie & Julia. Great movie! It's all about blogging and food. What's better than that? I mean, that's pretty much what I do, right?

After the movie, I did what any red-blooded American Woman would do when in a funk. I went shopping. I landed at Target. I heart Target. Especially when it's a Super Target. You get Food and Fashion all in the same place. It's great. I restricted my shopping to things I needed but wouldn't just buy everyday like nail polish. I got a great color. Fantab really. It's a metallic grayish pink. It's on my fingers and toes. In the sun, I look like I have pink chrome on my nails. Awesome. I'll get the name of it tonight and add a Post-Post Script tomorrow.

So, Sunday I still wasn't feeling all shiny and happy so, off to the stores again. I'll share a little make-up tip with you. Sally Beauty Supply has a great line called Femme Couture Mineral Effects. It's great stuff. Really. I wouldn't steer you wrong when it comes to war paint. Also, it's way cheaper than most mineral make-up. WAY cheaper.

I also decided to do my own highlights. Money Saving tips and all. When I lived in Big Southern City, my BFF was my stylist for YEARS. He knew my hair better than I did. The relationship ended when I moved to Beachtown. It took a year to find a replacement. When I did, it was magical. Fireworks and everything! I just moved to Small Southern City 5 months ago. I still haven't met The One. As you can see, I take hair very seriously, so this whole do-it-yourself thing has me a little worried. Keep your fingers crossed.

I decided I need a new top. I went to Avenue after Sally's. It's hit or miss. On Sunday, it was all miss. I'm going to Khol's sometime this week. I heart Khol's, too. I need a top. I need something that makes me feel pretty. Thus, the new do, war paint, and finger/toe nails. A new top will just 'top' everything like a cherry on a sundae. Or nuts, if you prefer.

I had one of those last night. A sundae, that is. This blogging business has made me realize I have a thing for ice cream. Note to self, break up with ice cream. I had to do the walk of shame from my car to my place at the top of The Stairs. At least I got a bit of exercise in the process. Doubt it worked off that fudge.

Funkiest Funk has opened the door to ungood eating. Well, it's been good, but not "good for you". I've tried, but pretty much failed for over a week. See Weight above. I'm almost back where I started. Yea. Go me. I realized something though. I'm addicted to my fat. It gives me an excuse to eat sundaes. I told you this is my love/hate relationship with the world of weight. I wasn't lyin.

As much as I try to change, to shed the poundage, I have to admit find comfort and solace in the buldge. I also love to hate it, too. OMG What is wrong with me??!! I have these arguments with my fat. Sometimes I win, sometimes my fat does. Either way, the battle's not too pretty.

I think I need a 12-step. I've admitted I'm fat-I mean I'm addicted to my fat. Step one down. Now I need to change my ways. I need to do something that is anti-fat. I'm not ready to give up food, so I think I'm actually going to have to start being ACTIVE. Ew. Who wants to be my buddy? There's no talking about my shopping, though.

-jafg

Disclaimer:
Please note that this blog is not making light of other addictions such as Alcohol or Narcotics or such. If you are on your own journey of recovery, I sincerely wish you the best of luck.

Over The Shoulder Boulder Holder

08/12/09

281.4 lbs

I usually work on this blog during my "lunchtime". I had a lot of meetings and stuff today so now's my break. Talk about some withdrawals. I've missed you, my people. I may even have to start writing on the weekends. I heart you all that much.

So. I've been thinking about my bras. And my breasts. And the fact that I really don't care much for either. I started wearing a bra when I was in 4th grade. There was no training period. I woke up one morning and BOOM! There they were. It's been down hill ever since.

My bra is very uncomfortable today. My bra is very uncomfortable most days. I have two different types of bras. I have a cotton-underwire type of bra that has no defined cup shape. I then have a defined cup/underwire plunge-type of bra that I wear. Cotton Bra is worn after work and on weekends when I'm not going anywhere. It really provides little support but The Girls do have some coverage and don't hang down with no direction. Plunge Bra is for every other time of my life.

I get my bras at LB (for those of you who don't speak 'fat girl' slang, that's short for Lane Bryant). I buy the same style. I haven't branched out in I don't know how long. Like I said, I get the kind that plunge (\/). I'm not gonna lie here, I embrace my cleavage. I mean, in the right Bra/Top combo,I look well-defined. It's completely false advertising because everything's pulled up to the front, but I don't care. I feel better when I walk into a place. I'm not Elvira, I do have a sense of modesty and taste, but I like to accenuate my femininity (Wikipedia has an entry for that, too). Plus, Plunge Bra makes me feel like I have on pretty lingerie. Especially when my bottoms match my tops.

I've been watching my bra-size slowly creep higher over the past few years. I don't mean cup-size, either. I was looking at LB online and saw some "full coverage" bras. Honestly, I don't think I have enough BOOB for these bras. I've got my fair share of the side-boob, but not real BOOB-boob. This is the reason a lot of the "plus size" tops don't look great on me. I'm not that top-heavy! I get a little frustrated because fat girls with average sized boobs need tops too! And bras! THAT ARE COMFORTABLE!

I was watching More To Love last night. I tweeted a lot about it which relieved a lot of the immediate aggravation that rises from that show. Anyway, speaking from a completely plutonic perspective, those girls got a lot goin' on in the Bra department. I'm not jealous of the BOOB-factor, but I am jealous of the clothes they can wear that I can't. I miss cute clothes. Tops, especially. I miss skirts, too, but I dislike friction more. But, that's a story for another day.

-jafg