Monday Musings

07/19/10

278.4 lbs

Technically, that belongs to yesterday since I didn't weigh today.

Right now I was Starbucks SO BAD.  I'm going to settle for a coffee from downstairs with powdered creamer (read empty calories and a little bit of fat) and a splenda.  Whatever.

I feel somewhat returned to the land of the living.  I don't have that super stressed feeling that's been sitting on me for like the past month.  I took a few days, put things on paper, and see now that the sky isn't actually falling.  So now what?

I totally binged on fast food breakfast Sunday.  There's my weekend confession.  I had been out having an adult beverage or two the night before and totally caved to the temptation.  It's been a long while and it was good.  I'm glad that's out of my system.

Well, yesterday I bought groceries.  I meal planned and ended up with one guilty pleasure for which I totally do NOT feel bad about, stuff to make baked tacos.  It's made with flour tortillas.  I also got lean ground turkey and will have plenty lettuce and tomato for the top.  I did get low fat sour cream.  I don't believe in fat free unless it's naturally occuring.  That's just me.   Other than that, I have some beautiful sweet potatoes, lean centercut pork chops, chicken cutlets and thighs.  Also, I have plenty of steam bag veggies which last longer.  I hate it when I don't use my produce and have to throw it away.

Speaking of spoiling produce, I've signed up for a veggie co-op program and am looking forward to my first delivery this week. Not only will I be supporting local farms, but I will also be getting food that is SO fresh. I can't wait! It's costing me about $150 a month with weekly deliveries. That isn't bad for fresh organic locally grown produce. I'll let you know how it goes.

So I was inspired by JewliaGoulia's Friday post in which she laid out her pantry and fridge details.  She had all pre-portioned pre-prepared food for her easy access.  I decided I can do something similar too.  I got two pieces of watermelon ($.80 each!!!) and chopped them up.  It was a great evening snack because it's so sweet and succulent.  Plus, that $1.60 worth of watermelon will totally last me through the week (as long as it doesn't go bad)!

Well, BB's bachelorette party is set for the weekend of August 13.  We were going to the beach, but in light of all the oil issues, we've opted for New Orleans in stead.  Awesome!  I can't imagine what kind of trouble will ensue. 

I'm  setting aside bail money, just in case.

-jafg

Calorie Girl

05/04/10


283.4 lbs

I have to get on an airplane next Wednesday morning and I'm hoping to break into the 70's by then. I was really hoping for a solid 275 lbs, but I don't know if that's still doable now. We'll keep trying.

Sit back and relax. This is gonna be a long one.

Ok, so I've not been a healthy feeling JAFG the past few days. I even missed work yesterday which means I missed HHH class last night. I am all sadfaced about missing my workout last night. When I go back on Wednesday it’ll feel like starting from day 1 again. I hate that. I am planning on working out tonight. I need to stay in the habit.

I did go to workout on Friday which gave me a great sense of accomplishment. Go Me! I actually got in 70 work-out minutes. It felt great.

I had every intention of working out over the weekend, but I just wasn't up for anything requiring me to be outside of the abode. I felt all ick. The only reason I went out Sunday was because I was gonna have to start sharing cat food with Kitty and I'm pretty sure he'd see me starve and wither first. Saturday I added a plant to my patio garden and didn't do pretty much anything else.

Oh, I did order pizza. I got two medium thin crust pizzas actually (Domino's had a 2-pizza-2-topping-5.99-each special). It could be considered 4 pizzas because I got each half with a different 2-topping combination. Genius, really. I don't know why I haven't thought about this before.

Pizza one: One half pepperoni and mushroom (which, if you haven't learned by now, is my favorite), one half ham and pineapple (something I haven't tried since I was a kid and thought I'd try it again...now I remember why I haven't tried it since I was a kid), both sides with bell pepper. Pizza two: One half mushroom and black olives, one half spinach and feta, both sides with onion and white sauce. Yes, that's order craziness, but I placed the order online to cut out some of the possibility of mayhem. I'm sure someone somewhere in the process thought I must be high. I assure you I was not.

Now, before you start thinking that I had a pizza pig-out fest, I ate on that for two days. That's like 3 meals. One dinner, one breakfast and one lunch. Yom.

On Sunday I went to the grocery. I got all sorts of mad healthy foods. I almost bought a half a pound cake. Which still weighed at least a pound. You know the ones with the hole in the middle of them? Yeah, I had it in my basket. I was super craving on something that tasted like it was from the naughty list. Ever get those cravings? (That's a rhetorical question.)

Then I saw these "day old bakery" bran muffins and thought, "hmmm, perhaps I should be a little more responsible with my splurging and save some money". So I placed the pound cake back on the table and meandered over to the bran muffins. There were 4 in the carton. I read the nutrition label and turns out each muffin has almost 500 calories. Each. Each! W. T. H. This is supposed to be a healthy alternative. My breakfast from Panera last week had fewer calories than that. And it had cheese in it! So, pass on the bran muffin.

What I opted for was a little 12 ounce size cup filled with mini cookies with m&ms. Also, I got one 1.74 oz package of peanut m&ms. I had the cookies Sunday night and the peanut m&ms last night. All this is logged in my myfitnesspal food diary. With the pizza. Also, I did not exercise this weekend. And I stayed home from work yesterday. And I still managed to drop poundage.

So, I have to tell you about a dinner I had last night. (I am SO looking forward to the leftovers tonight). I even took a picture of the recipe card so you could all share in this feast of goodness.

I had garlic-lime chicken fajitas. Yum yum yum yum Yum! Greatest thing about it, no prepackaged anything which means you control all the salt and stuff that goes in it. I varied this by adding mushrooms to the onion mix and went easy on the peppers) and cooking spinach on the side (just sautéed in some water). Also, I used non-fat Greek yogurt as a condiment. Have I said Yum, yet? I had one chicken breast in two fajita wraps and added the spinach to the fajita (just cooked it on its own, didn’t want to lose that “spinach” flavor). McCormack has a “spice pack” where all the spices are measured out for you. I found mine (completely by accident) at Publix. If you don’t have a Publix, don’t worry, the recipe tells you the exact measurements of each spice. You should go out right now and try this.

I must say, being off the exercise routine and still watching what I ate was a great life lesson for me. I even had little splurges and delivery and as long as I kept everything in check, I felt like a real person eating real food. I mean, I’m not eating diet food. I’m eating healthy food, lean meats, lots of veg, watching calories. The healthful food isn’t all that much of a change. But, I’ve never been a calorie girl.

I’m not obsessive, just health conscious. I now know that a vodka/soda beverage is way better than a long island iced tea when I’m out. Things like that really make a difference!



-jafg

I Need A Good 12-Step. Really.

08/24/09

285.4 lbs

That's from Saturday. It probably a little higher today, though.

Hello, blogging buddies. Did you miss me? It's been almost a week since my last confession. I mean blogpost. I'm feeling a little shameful about it.

I have been in the most funkiest funk. It started last week. I hit a metaphorical brick wall and am still kinda licking my wounds. Poor me. I crawled in bed at 5:00pm on Thursday and didn't get out until 10:00am Friday. And then I slept most of the day Friday, too. Saturday was a little better. I got out and saw Julie & Julia. Great movie! It's all about blogging and food. What's better than that? I mean, that's pretty much what I do, right?

After the movie, I did what any red-blooded American Woman would do when in a funk. I went shopping. I landed at Target. I heart Target. Especially when it's a Super Target. You get Food and Fashion all in the same place. It's great. I restricted my shopping to things I needed but wouldn't just buy everyday like nail polish. I got a great color. Fantab really. It's a metallic grayish pink. It's on my fingers and toes. In the sun, I look like I have pink chrome on my nails. Awesome. I'll get the name of it tonight and add a Post-Post Script tomorrow.

So, Sunday I still wasn't feeling all shiny and happy so, off to the stores again. I'll share a little make-up tip with you. Sally Beauty Supply has a great line called Femme Couture Mineral Effects. It's great stuff. Really. I wouldn't steer you wrong when it comes to war paint. Also, it's way cheaper than most mineral make-up. WAY cheaper.

I also decided to do my own highlights. Money Saving tips and all. When I lived in Big Southern City, my BFF was my stylist for YEARS. He knew my hair better than I did. The relationship ended when I moved to Beachtown. It took a year to find a replacement. When I did, it was magical. Fireworks and everything! I just moved to Small Southern City 5 months ago. I still haven't met The One. As you can see, I take hair very seriously, so this whole do-it-yourself thing has me a little worried. Keep your fingers crossed.

I decided I need a new top. I went to Avenue after Sally's. It's hit or miss. On Sunday, it was all miss. I'm going to Khol's sometime this week. I heart Khol's, too. I need a top. I need something that makes me feel pretty. Thus, the new do, war paint, and finger/toe nails. A new top will just 'top' everything like a cherry on a sundae. Or nuts, if you prefer.

I had one of those last night. A sundae, that is. This blogging business has made me realize I have a thing for ice cream. Note to self, break up with ice cream. I had to do the walk of shame from my car to my place at the top of The Stairs. At least I got a bit of exercise in the process. Doubt it worked off that fudge.

Funkiest Funk has opened the door to ungood eating. Well, it's been good, but not "good for you". I've tried, but pretty much failed for over a week. See Weight above. I'm almost back where I started. Yea. Go me. I realized something though. I'm addicted to my fat. It gives me an excuse to eat sundaes. I told you this is my love/hate relationship with the world of weight. I wasn't lyin.

As much as I try to change, to shed the poundage, I have to admit find comfort and solace in the buldge. I also love to hate it, too. OMG What is wrong with me??!! I have these arguments with my fat. Sometimes I win, sometimes my fat does. Either way, the battle's not too pretty.

I think I need a 12-step. I've admitted I'm fat-I mean I'm addicted to my fat. Step one down. Now I need to change my ways. I need to do something that is anti-fat. I'm not ready to give up food, so I think I'm actually going to have to start being ACTIVE. Ew. Who wants to be my buddy? There's no talking about my shopping, though.

-jafg

Disclaimer:
Please note that this blog is not making light of other addictions such as Alcohol or Narcotics or such. If you are on your own journey of recovery, I sincerely wish you the best of luck.

I'm Calling a Do-Over!

08/17/09

284.6 lbs

Apparently my fat is very sensitive to carbs and hangovers.

As you all know, I socialized last Thursday. I had a fantab time, too. It was fun to get out with friends on the town. And I do enjoy a good adult beverage. The thing is, the more I enjoy a good adult beverage the more I tend to partake of said good adult beverage. This leads to a night of a very happy fat girl who forgets about fat and focuses only on happy. This in itself is not a bad thing. However, after an undisclosed number of shots, 2:00am seems early and the happy girl just wants to have fun!

I also mentioned I am a serious rationalizer. This skill is only sharpened when adult beverages are added to the mix. As most people lose their ability to think logically as an evening progresses, my logic skills are increased 10-fold. It's very difficult to say no to my persuasive spins. Poor friends.

If you don't partake, then you don't know that the night of one too many will lead to a day of dread. The only thing that soothes the pain is grease-house food. Like Waffle House at 2:30 in the morning. If that 2:30 late-dinner-early-breakfast-date is bypassed, well then, it is a must the morning after. Or at some point in the day if one has a job to report to like me. I opted for a great greasy burger and fries (and soymilk) in the afternoon. And oreos. It was good.

I got home Friday night and my hangover had breakfast. Grits, biscuits, potatoes, bacon and an egg. Holy Crap. I didn't eat the egg. It didn't do too well after the first bite so I gave up on that. The grits were awesome. They had just a hint of colby-jack cheese added. It would seem that this would be enough to just do a person in, but my hangover wasn't finished with me yet. It needed icecream to top the evening off. It should be ashamed.

Saturday wasn't much better. I took a 3 hour nap. This is after having potatoes, bacon, and scrambled eggs for breakfast. It turns out I'm very out of practice from playing on a schoolnight. I was still feeling like shite. I don't think the food had anything to do with it. After I woke up, I realized I needed to go grocery shopping. Being in a very unmotivated state of mind, I opted for fast food mexican instead. At least I'd have to walk down The Stairs and back up again for the sin.

Sunday I woke up mopey. There's just no other word for it. Well, after coffee and a smoke I kicked myself in the ass. I realized that I'd have to face everyone on Monday and report all of this nonsense. I also realized that I still had no food in the house. This is not conducive to healthy living. I pulled out the weekly grocery flyers and tore through each of them. That's three stores, People. I spent my yesterday afternoon grocery shopping. There were some really great deals. I found albacore tuna 10 for $10! I got 15 cans. I also got Amy's Pizza for a really great deal! I had that for dinner last night.

I didn't spread this shopping excursion out over several days, I did it all in one big blowout. This means multiple trips up and down and back up The Stairs. I think that paid the price for my food transgressions.

I guess you could say I fell off the wagon this weekend. It's a good thing I'm not on a diet.

-jafg

Sweet Defeats

08/04/09

286.2 lbs.

Yeah. The weight-truth sucks sometimes. I recently visited some friends at the beach and was given a starter for Amish Friendship Bread. If you don't know what it is, you're missing out. If you do know what it is, then you know my predicament. Once you make your first loaf you're hooked. It's awesome. You can add nuts, different flavors, and pretty much make it anything you like. I just made some banana walnut version of it. OMG. It's to die for. On top of that, the local grocery store had my favorite ice cream pints on sale for $.99. Less than a dollar a pint, People! I bought 2. Okay, 3. Over the course of the weekend I've consumed ice cream (only one pint) and freakin' awesome banana nut friendship bread. This is not part of healthy living.

I'm also on a budget. A tight one. It's difficult to shop healthy and cheaply at the same time. The trick to really good, healthy eating is the number of ingredients in a pre-packaged food item you may be buying. The more ingredients an item has, odds are the less likely it is to be healthy. This is true of the "diet foods" as well. But...have you ever noticed how the less ingredients something has the more expensive it is to purchase? Herein lies the rub so to speak.

I'm a fan of locally grown products. I'm a fan of organic products. These are actually more expensive to purchase than their counter-parts. On some things I won't budge. I will only buy organic soy milk. Fortunately, most stores now have 'store-brand' organic soy milk so I'm pretty good on that. I really prefer to buy eggs from hormone-free, vegeterian-grain-fed chickens. Occasionally, I will break down and buy the cheaper ones, but only when I really have to watch every penny.

I'm trying to buy ingredients for meals to prepare at home and trying to be healthy while doing it. Here's some pointers. Sweet potatoes are better for you than white potatoes and are just as filling. Brown rice has all the fiber retianed while white rice doesn't. Frozen veggies are cheaper than fresh veggies most of the time and you get more bang for your buck. Veggies from the frozen food section really aren't that bad unless you're buying the ones with the cheese sauce. Speaking of cheese, the firmer the cheese is the healthier it is, also (that's true for "female health" as well). With the exception of goat cheese and feta; these aren't too bad in moderation. Moderation is the key. [Insert annoying cliche' alarm, here.]

A good grocery list is a lot like core-wardrobing. You get maximum variety with minimum ingredients. Pick up a few light-cooking magazines. Maybe invest in a healthy cookbook. Read the the ingredient lists and figure out which repeat themselves most often. Taylor those to your tastes and there ya go! You've got a start for a week's worth of menus.

I'm fortunate enough to live in an urban environment where I can shop at several stores that are close to where I live. It's important to review the grocery flyers you get in the mail or in the paper. Figure out where the best deal is spread your shopping over a few days. This is awesome for me because I'm never motivated to go out and get what I need. It's so much easier to just pick up dinner on the way home. Especially when I can buy a pizza that's already cooked for about $7 (I won't say where to avoid any temptations tonight). Or a burger for that matter. Or Bar-B-Q. See, I'm already moving in the wrong direction.

Okay. So, I have been taking the stairs! Only a few times has the elevator been used. One time I was going with someone else and just used the elevator with them (next time I'll be stronger) and the other time I was really freakin' hot from being outside for lunch (southern heat has high humidity) and just plain took the lazy way up to my workspace. I'm being honest! Give me some credit for that!

I still have ice cream in my freezer. I can't imagine I'll part with it down the drain either. I'm going to have to incorporate more movement into my daily routine because of this. I can say that the next batch Friendship Bread I make will be brought into work and shared with everyone else's hips. What are friends for, anyway?


-jafg


P.S. I have my first real follower! Thanks, Peace Turkey, for the words of encouragement! Congrats on the gym membership. You're a stronger woman than I am.