285.4 lbs
The weekend is still catching up with me. [sadface]
I've been nervous all day today. For whatever reason, I woke up late. Really late. I was 30 minutes late to work. I went to make coffee and got coffee grounds all in my cup. I had Arby's for lunch. We're talking Beef 'n Cheddar and potato cakes. And Dr. Pepper. I called my mom to tell her I was feeling a bit depressed today. This doesn't happen often, so when it does, I notice.
My real job has three big meetings a month. Today was one of them. I started sweating this meeting as if it was the first time I'd be in the same room with these people. It was wierd. My Chi was off and I don't even know what Chi is. Let's just say it was an interesting meeting.
I notice my hand finds its way to my mouth much more frequently when I'm nervous. I mean, I pretty much can find any reason to eat, but the mindless eating happens a lot when I'm nervous. I just had a bite-size Twix and Snicker Bar. Damn Snicker Bar.
I probably should do something else other than eat. Well, I do, I smoke. But I can't chain smoke inside the building and "They'd" probably notice if I moved my office outside. I should probably practice yoga breathing or something zen like that.
Or maybe I should take a xanax.
-jafg
2 comments:
I miss smoking. No, really. I do. I remember it fondly. I was never 'physically' addicted. Like, I didn't get the shakes after four hours with no cigarette. I could go a day or two and not even notice. It was a psychological addiction more than anything else. Like, a sort of tangible reminder to take long, slow, deep breaths when I was stressed.
Parliament Menthol Ultra Lights, how I loved thee.....
*sigh*
How freakin' funny is this...I smoke Parliament Ultra Lights! No menthol, but still, you can find the humor in this.
A lot of places don't carry the ultra lights, so I spend half my time smoking lights.
Awesome.
-jafg
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